I’ve been going through my old notes folder from when I first started learning chaos magic, and it was horrifyingly embarrassing. Really cringe-worthy things like: for practice at sigils, I did one to make me walk past someone famous. In the results I wrote, “a lady outside the shop said, “I’m famous now because my brother was on the front page of the local paper.” Also, the queen was visiting the town and I could have walked past her, except I didn’t know that she was visiting.”
In other words, that sigil made me notice it when someone said the word ‘famous’, but did nothing else. I spent the day ripping up all the material like that, and rewriting some of the rest.
In fact, I don’t do sigils very often, and the last two that I did worked very well. Interestingly enough they were both to benefit other people, which seemed to make me more relaxed.
Chaos magicians now seem to me to be getting back to using spirits: gods, angels and demons, like magicians did before them. They have realized that these spirits are much more powerful than human beings. However, I still think that so -called ‘direct manipulation magic’ is a great thing, when a human being does it completely by themselves. It’s cheating to ask someone else to do it all the time. It might even be better to start with those horrible cringe-worthy experiments, and gradually improve, because then you have developed a small amount of angel-like ability.
Going on further into the note folder, I found that I really put my heart into evoking the chaos egregores. I’d forgotten that I did it with so much detail and dedication, and it’s no wonder I needed a break from it and stopped doing it to concentrate on hypersigils instead. That part of chaos magic where you evoke egregores is really just like ceremonial magic, and the egregores are nutty, eccentric creatures, and as I’m always saying I think a lot of them are new forms of old demons.
I remember I didn’t like having to think up a request to make to the egregores: I just wanted to find out more about them. They say wonderful things: Ino once said she was going to write something on the back of a meme. Most of them do want human beings to be self-reliant, to learn about sigils and related techniques and to experiment with different ways of doing them. You can make an offering to an egregore and ask for something, and I often did that just because the instructions said to do it, without thinking about how that’s the same as ceremonial magic. But there are a lot of teaching servitors and egregores that like human beings to learn to do everything themselves.
This is also on my blog at the Occult Corpus forum